How to be the big shot.
I’ve talked until my face turned blue about fed-heads earning a rep (reputation) in our ewrestling kingdom. After rushing to emergency to find out if “blue face” is a sexual condition, I decided to help the much neglected ewrestler. I’d do more for the ewrestlers, but the fact that most of you own, or want to own an efed is kind of a bummer.
Picture this:
WHO'S THE BEEYOTCH NOW??
You storm into your high school, stand on the lunch table during a highly active hour, kick a few trays on the floor and light off a few m80s to get everyone’s attention. Now that you have their undivided attention, you proceed to announce that you alone are the best in the school, you can and will kick anyone’s ass that disagrees and then insult the football team.
In high-school, even the goths would join in on a passionate ass-whooping after school is over. However, in our little bizzaro fantasy world, this type of behavior is encouraged and expected.
Welcome to eWrestling!
In order to gain a following of people that think you pretend to be a wrestler better than they do, you have to quickly get attention. The funny part is this can seriously backfire and leave you being the next big douche-bag. So you have to choose your battles here, nobody can tell you when the time is right to pounce.
You have to make a choice. Do you want to be just one of the boys? Or do you want to be the top dog in a room full of puppies? Or is that a shark in a room full of guppies? Or is it a fish tank? Either way, your choice to be a part of the team or be the big shit is a big one.
There is a small time frame that you can pull this off. You have to do it before people find out what a fraud you are, but you have to do it after they know you have some talent.
From past experience, I’ve seen this happen in a few different ways.
- Winning a tournament is a good way to pull this off. This way, you pretty much never have to do anything worthwhile again, you can pull the “I won a tourny” card whenever you are challenged and it’s an auto-win.
- Take advantage of a no-show. Wait to see if a top guy flakes and ask to be put in his place with a winning RP.
- If you are generally witty and a dip-shit, this behavior might come natural to you. But don’t get me wrong, the top dog spot just isn’t for everyone. Not everyone can pull it off.
You can be the modest, humble top dog whose work speaks for itself. I’ve seen this happen, tho it’s rare. I think Level One comes to mind, people rave about this guy and so far I’ve not seen him brag once. Came quite close to winning my own tournament and many people think he should have. Problem is, you have to be legitimately good to pull this one off.
There’s one last way to get that coveted spot at the top of your roster. Just brag, constantly about how great you are and eventually people will believe you. I’ve seen this happen often lol. Even people that have never delivered.
If I could blow my own horn, I’d prolly not be writing this.
Yeah, so, I hope you enjoyed my short sneeze on the efed world. It was meant to be in jest, BTW.
I’mma comment junkie, so COM!
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3 comments
Rancid on November 15, 2009 at 7:52 pm
Comment?
steve on March 6, 2010 at 9:21 am
this was a really good article, covers a lot of what draws a lot of us to ewrestling in the first place. it does take a certain brashness to be successful in ewrestling, and those that do it the best move quickly towards the top. thanks for the read.
Kut on March 6, 2010 at 1:39 pm
<3