Another K&P for the great few that enjoy my occasional lapses in judgment and sanity. Been putting this off for a few days, because basically I didn’t feel like finishing it. So I half assed my way through the rest of it before the news gets cold and soggy.

It’s lazy, it’s rushed and it’s probably not funny at all but it’s something on the net, so it’s awesome. Thank you.

5. Traffic

armbar2005

Nothing pisses a wrestler off more than driving a car and someone ahead of them is not driving fast enough. I mean, seriously, don’t you muther fuckers know that you should MOVE when someone is flashing their headlights and honking their horn like a maniac behind you! I don’t blame Flair for pulling that dumb fuck out of his car and beating the holy hell out of him! I feel like beating an R&B singer just thinking about this!!

flair-rage

I mean HOW DARE you drive slow! Share the road! Didn’t your momma teach you how to share? Share, or a wrestler will beat you retarded until the cops drag him off of you.

http://www.wsoctv.com/news/5420940/detail.html

http://www.thesmokinggun.com/archive/1129051ric1.html

4. Women

Some wrestlers have the worst luck with women, they end up slamming their face into things.. like fists, they end up divorcing them and some of them have even had the nerve to die on them. This kind of extreme behavior tends to make the boys look bad.

Batista once reportedly said that- yeah his wife had cancer, but she couldn’t at least vacuum? What a freakin’ lazy cow! She deserved Batista getting back at her cancer ridden ass by tearing apart the vaginae of a few Divas. Meleena being one of the reported lucky 20.

I don’t think anyone, well besides maybe Chris Benoit has worse luck with women than Kurt Angle. First his wife, Karen pretty much openly fucked him over on TV and made money off of it, then she bangs the guy that got Kurt to jump to TNA (Double J) then Kurt finally moves on with his life and found someone almost just as bad!

According to police, a few days ago there was an altercation between Kurt and his live in girlfriend Trenesha Biggers, who wrestles under the name Rhaka Khan. After getting beat up, Trenesha called police – who removed Kurt from their home. She also went to the police station and got an order of protection out against Kurt.

But that didn’t stop him. At around 8AM yesterday, Trenesha called police again – claiming that Angle was stalking her. She was Starbucks using the internet, and Kurt came in – and snatched her phone. He then began driving around the Starbucks parking lot in circles while he was deleting pictures from Trenesha’s phone. Those pictures documented the abuse Trenesha suffered at the hands of her wrestler boyfriend.

Angle was arrested for driving on a suspended license, and when they searched the vehicle, they found used syringes and two vials of HGH – an illegal steroid.

How DARE she take photos or whatever she was doing at Starbucks? I mean, who goes to Starbucks to use the net besides uppity asshole intellectuals. What’s she trying to do, make Kurt look like an asshole? They’ll look at her and say “That’s Kurt Angle’s chick, he must be an uppity asshole!” She probably put all that illegal dope in his car too since she likes to frame people.

Don’t forget about Steve Austin and his ex- Debra. What she must have done to piss that super-nice man off so many times is beyond me. It must have been terrible what she did to make him come close to injuring his fists and cost them money. He NEEDS those fists for work! It was pretty much his whole arsenal, punches and kicks. He probably just needed someone to practice his new move on (The bloody nose), and since Debby was a wrestler, he figured why not.

Then, this women decides to pawn his ring on eBay just for him divorcing her! That was a symbol of their love!!

I don’t blame pro-wrestlers for being so flamboyantly gay!

3. Drugs

Some might think pro-wrestlers love drugs, since they use so much of it. But drugs have cost wrestlers HIGH amounts of humiliation and heart-ache. Stupid drugs, they keep forcing themselves on these poor unsuspecting wrestlers and costing them money, freedom and even their very lives.

It’s a shame really, these sneaky narcotics and illegal substances find their way into locker rooms, parties and then they posses the wrestlers to do some of the most stupid things. Like eventually kill themselves.

hearty-busted001Just days after leaving WWE Jeff Hardy has been arrested after being caught in possession of controlled prescription pills, anabolic steroids, opium and cocaine among others. He posted $125,000 bail bond at the Moore County jail.

Jeff was arrested after a search of his residence revealed he was in possession of 262 Vicodin prescription pills, 180 Soma prescription pills, 555 milliliters of anabolic steroids, a “residual amount of powder cocaine” and drug paraphernalia items. The report notes that “Vicodin and anabolic steroids are Schedule III substances”, while Soma is a non-controlled prescription pill.

He was also charged with felony trafficking in opium on top of two counts of felony possession with intent to sell or deliver a Schedule III controlled substance, felony maintaining a dwelling to keep controlled substance, felony possession of cocaine and misdemeanor possession of drug paraphernalia.

The search was part of a joint investigation conducted by the Moore County Sheriff’s Office narcotics and select enforcement units and the Fayetteville Police Department. They’ve had their eye on him for a while.

Stupid media, always reporting their lies! At least that’s what Jeff said on his twitter. The media exaggerated all those drugs in his home and it’s blown way out of proportion, of course. It’s clearly a conspiracy to make Jeff look like he has somewhat of a problem with drugs. Jeff doesn’t have a problem with drugs, in fact he seems to be more than accepting of drugs.  Maybe CM Punk is right this time. …This time. But why should I believe some fancy news reporters over Jeff who is obviously totally in control of his actions… plus he was there and can prove it!

hearty-busted2001

hearty-busted2001

I jacked these photos from my members on my forums http://roughkut.com/kamp_v3/index.php?topic=16366.msg154339;topicseen#new

2. Fans… especially smarks.

Ever since my epic fight with Edge about 10 years ago at an autograph signing, I’ve noticed that wrestlers not only hate fans but rejoice at the chance to fuck them up them whenever possible. Even if it means bailing on a match, or breaking character when a fan hops the rails to enter the ring. As soon as the threat of a law suit is off the table, the wrestlers go nuts on a fan. When you hop that rail, you are no longer protected by the law.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q_bASOtoiow

Who can really blame them tho? Most fans suck and are douche bags.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=otnVqCAxMeU

I mean, hell we think we know everything just because we read stuff on the net. We hop those rails, to get involved in the match knowing we’ll get stomped into the ground and we occasionally hurt their feelings when we chant obnoxious things at smaller events. Like at a venue where maybe 300 were in attendance at a small event I worked at, Greg Valentine was there and a large group of fans started chanting “KEEP YOUR SHIRT ON CLAP CLAP CLAP CLAP”.  He couldn’t help but hear this and I think I saw a lone tear roll down his man-tit. He was probably confused on why they were chanting the word “CLAP”.

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1n23yHi94MQ

1. Saying wrestling is fake

Nothing and I mean nothing has caused more reporters and fans to get brutally assaulted than simply asking one seemingly innocent question: Is wrestling fake?

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QL0vHL1LgXs

On the surface, the question seems valid. But to a wrestler the question equals “You’re a huge cavernous vagina and your career is a joke and your daddy left you as a child”.

How would you like it if someone called your job worthless to your face?

httpv://www.youtube.com/watch?v=S2-u-fjYZcQ

Honestly, a lot of these seem pretty scripted being wrestling is fake. Sorry, wrestling is not fake. It’s just entertainment.


Pro Wrestler Attacks News Anchor – Watch more Funny Videos


I don’t even feel much like closing this one, so fuck it.

Cheerio,

Kut


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